top of page


Updated: Mar 18

When dealing with a loved one who is in denial to a certain level of care needs, you have to become creative, and enter into a short term plan that allows the loved one to assist in making decisions on how to reach the goal of the care need. Ex: A loved one who agrees with needing some help, but not to the extent of which the family verbalizes to them. Instead of saying things like, "you can not do it yourself", "someone has to do it for you", eliminate descriptive words of inability, this can be done by allowing the caregiver to follow the lead of the loved one during care services, at the pace and direction that seems to be allowing your loved one to actually do the task, even though the caregiver is performing the service. When the threat of losing independence is looming over the head of a person who has been independent this can cause friction, denial, and anger. Allowing participation in how, when, how often, and where is usually all the loved one needs to control to get the task done, they are aware that they need assistance, that is not in question, but removing them from participation all together is not what you want to do in a situation when there is denial on the level of care is needed.

Allowing your loved one to be a part of decision making can minimize refusal of assistance, as well as increase mobility, physical and mental strengths. Most seniors and those who live with a disability that has a cognitive process that is still strong, but physical strengths has weakened should be allowed to control the care need process as much as possible as long as there is not a safety threat.

Time consumption should not be a deterrent, for example, when showering.

When the caregiver takes full control of performing a standard shower, that includes, the shower / bath, skin moisturizing, hair care and dressing, it can be completed within 45 minutes or less, but with a individual that is cognitive, independent, but has minimum physical ability performance, the shower could take an hour or more and should be allowed, one who still likes to assist in their meal preparation, this time allowance should be allowed, patience is key to the start and ending of a pleasant day when the time needed to complete the tasks are available.

A good assessment at the introduction of care services determines the time it will take for a service to be completed.

The level of care needed( tier 1 tier 2 or tier 3 ) and the manner in how it should be done, and not what is considered to be the norm, there is no norm, there is commonality in care provisions, but each person care services should be individualized.

Reducing anyone who is in need of care assistance, to a service of personal care needs is an attack on dignity.

In and out services are never in good quality, it lacks compassion, and human interaction, and no one looks forward to any form humiliation, even when it is unintentional, so preventing this at all from happening is the best solution.

Follow me for my Blogs at

15 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All


Being a Caregiver is not something you can become being a Caregiver is who and what you are. Being a Caregiver which include the Direct Care Workforce, Nurses, the Agency Providers, the Non-Profit Org


bottom of page